My Unique Life in Windows Live Space: Life

Trying to Understand

Sat, 17 May 2008 15:21:12 GMT

I have been "Trying to Understand" my reasons for attempting to learn how to write. What is it that is driving this desire? It frustrates me to no end, because I feel I will never succeed at accomplishing this monumental achievement. I know that accomplishing the challenge that I have made to myself to write something in my Blog every day has something to do with this obsession.

I love the feeling of putting my thoughts into words, and I have written about the therapeutic aspects of writing. The frustration I feel is overwhelming when I cannot get the words to meet the desires in my heart. I read this article: Before You Write, Get Centered and I believe that many of the problems that I am having with my writing are because of the fact that I can't get centered.

I am more or less just trying to write for the sake of writing, and as Steve said in his article, "To write well, you must be centered so you can focus on the job at hand and push other thoughts and distractions out of your mind." I loved Steve's article but being focused is not something I think I am capable of accomplishing with writing my thoughts in this type of "off the top of my head" type of Journaling/Writing/Blogging.

Just trying to be focused enough to put some words on the page regarding his article has me confused as to what the purpose of me writing this is? Stating that has me thinking that maybe it is not my writing that is the problem but my mind...Like that is any great revelation to me. The feeling of never being satisfied with my writing is constantly tearing at my heart.

Steve's talking about distractions: Makes me think that my distraction is my mind, because I really don't have any other distractions present that I am aware of...The psychological aspects of writing could be my distraction, because I am always thinking about the reader, which is a big distraction to me, and it shouldn't be.

Maybe just facing reality in my writing ability and my mental capacity is what I need to do...Like a lens of a camera that cannot be focused, trying to get clarity of thought from a mind that is not capable of achieve it, is the feudality of this situation. I know that sounds harsh: But you can't make a silk purse out of sow's ear either, and facing reality can be our toughest endeavor.

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Anything but Ordinary

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:57:14 GMT

Anything but Ordinary by Avril Lavigne

I just love this "Anything but Ordinary" song/video by Avril Lavigne, especially the lyrics, and I want to use the words to this song for my writing prompt today. "Sometimes I get so weird" is something that I feel quite often about myself, and I wrote about it in this entry: What is Normal? or this one: I am getting so Paranoid is just one of the many entries where I feel like: I Think Different.

"I even freak myself out" is a feeling I have when I try to write what's on my mind everyday, and I have such a hard time just trying to put my thoughts into words. I often think that I should quit trying to write, but it has become what I feel is a great form of therapy and it makes me feel good. "I laugh myself to sleep" is not something that I do, but I probably should. I meditate myself to sleep; I focus on my breathing and try to reach an inner peace with my mind, "it's my lullaby."

"Sometimes I drive so fast" reminds me of the adrenaline rush that I love so much and it brings to mind: Mazda's Thoughts, and the reason that I took up flying in college, because of the exhilaration of racing and flying is fantastic. "Just to feel the danger" is the ultimate meaning of life to have pushed yourself to the limits of your ability and survive, is what it's all about. "I wanna scream It makes me feel alive."

"Is it enough to love?" Is to question the very meaning of existence, is anything ever enough? "Is it enough to breathe? To keep striving for more and more each and every day is what makes our achievements so valuable to us. "Somebody rip my heart out" is what failure to achieve your desires in life is "And leave me here to bleed" is how it makes you feel and it makes you ask yourself the question, "Is it enough to die?"

"Somebody save my life" is a prayer to God in thanks for sending Jesus to die on the cross for the sins of the world so that we can have eternal life in heaven with Them. "I'd rather be anything but ordinary please" is the fact that we are all unique and by no means ordinary, we are all individuals. "To walk within the lines" is to not express your God given right to free will and use your imagination to take you places you thought that you could never go.

"Would make my life so boring" is what happens when you don't follow your heart and do what you know is right for yourself. "I want to know that I have been to the extreme" is following your heart and living your dreams and desires so that when you die you can honesty say to yourself, "I have lived my life to the fullest as I possible could!" "So knock me off my feet" is to live your wildest dreams and don't hold back, "Come on now give it to me" is the challenge you make to yourself to do what you think you cannot.

"Anything to make me feel alive" is the constant need for excitement in life and the feeling of learning something new, when you realize that you are starting another brand new day!

Today is going to be the best day of your life!

I have really enjoyed writing this today and it all started with: Get Over It! I did a search on "let it go" and this is where it has lead me. I don't know what it all means, but it gave me something to write about today.

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Practice Makes Perfect!

Sat, 12 Apr 2008 15:53:25 GMT

I am beginning to question the saying, "Practice Makes Perfect!" I have been making a lot of errors and mistakes in grammar on the Internet that I cannot correct. To think that my embarrassment for making these mistakes will last as long as the pages they were made on, is something I must resist. I obsess over the mistakes I have made in life to the point of making myself miserable, too! But WHY? What can I possibly achieve by letting things I can't change destroy my will to succeed?

I believe it is some form of self destructive behavior I have conjured up in order to prove to myself that I am not capable of accomplishing my goals in life. It really doesn't make any sense to me as to why I would be doing such a thing terrible thing to myself. Writing these thoughts on the page for the world to see also seems like some kind of punishment I am doing to myself.

It could be exactly what I need to do though, because I have this image of myself that I should be perfect. We all know that only God is perfect, and maybe that's what I need to realize that I am only human and I am going to make mistakes. One would think at my age I would be well aware of this realization, and not find the need to express my thoughts this way.

I think it has something to do with overcoming my ego and admitting that I care more about the things that I write than anyone reading them ever could. To me my words are very personal, but to you it's just something to read. Writing these realizations I think will help me in accomplishing my goal to be able to communicate my thoughts. There're so many things that I just won't allow myself to write about, but think about quite frequently.

I tend to look at the words I write on the page more as just writing practice. Expressing my thoughts into words and learning how to write. Although I am conscious of the fact that anyone can read this: I am also aware of what I am trying to accomplish and the reason I am writing everyday. I liked this quote:

School is practice for future life, practice makes perfect and nobodys perfect, so why practice?
Billie Joe Armstrong

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Not the same Page

Sat, 23 Feb 2008 15:37:17 GMT

I don't know what page in my life that I am on but evidently it's "Not the same Page" as everyone else or at least that's how I feel about it. I have always felt that I was different than everyone else and maybe you feel the same way or maybe not. It's like when I try to write, I can't seem to just say what's on my mind, I don't know if it's because I am not on the same page as everyone else or if it's because of my uniqueness.

When I started my Windows Live Space site I had all kinds of visions of meeting people that feel the same way that I do, but what I am discovering is that maybe it's just me that feels this way. It could be because of my introverted personality that has me always thinking that I am the only one that feels like this: I feel so uncomfortable just writing these thoughts, but never the less; this is what I am thinking.

I have felt this way my entire life: I had always thought that it was something that I would grow out of and be able to fit in socially. That's not the case though, I am over 50 years old now and my mind is still the same as when I was a child and I feel like I will never fit in. This is such a revealing piece of writing that I am hesitant to even publish it, but I feel that getting these feelings out into the open will help me to overcome these thoughts.

That's one of the problems that I have with writing; is that I think that everyone's going to read this and think that I am antisocial. When in reality, it is just the opposite and I have such a hard time expressing my thoughts into writing. I take everything that I say so personally and I am embarrassed to reveal my thoughts to the world. When really this means more to me than to anyone that might read it, and that's why I am writing it.

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

What Do You Want From Life?

Sat, 16 Feb 2008 18:53:15 GMT

I think this is a great question, and a great song by the Tubes and I am going to ask this question today in Live QnA, "What Do You Want From Life?" I have written about this before: What do You want from Life? but I still don't know what my answer is, you might be thinking, Then why write about it again today? and I will tell you, "I asked this question yesterday in QnA: What is the best way to find new interests in life?" and I really liked the answers that I received.

I also made a new friend ZoneZero, and I learned something from him, and that's you have to ask for what you want. I mean, I know this; it's what The Secret and the Law of Attraction is: To ask the Universe for what you desire in life. He has over 375 friends and he got all those friends by asking for them, in QnA and in other places, I would imagine. But that's my point, how are you going to make friends, learn something new or for that matter, find the answers to anything, if you won't ask the questions?

What I am talking about is; I am afraid to ask questions because I don't want anyone to think that I don't know the answers, isn't that ridiculous? I need to lighten up and have some fun, who do I think I am anyway Einstein or something. I do this with so many things in my life; not facing the facts and pretending to know or understand something, when it's clear that I don't. I am going to ask some questions; maybe you have some questions that you would like to find the answers too? Come on and play!

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

How I Felt About Being Old?

Fri, 15 Feb 2008 14:07:18 GMT

I received this Email today and I liked it so much that I wanted to share it with all of you:

I know the majority of us have not reached our wrinkly stage yet, but read on.......... Now for us wrinkly's this is JUST the tonic we need !!...... enjoy!

The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know.

Old Age, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don't agonize over those things for long.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be
messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging. Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon?
I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60&70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will. I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things. Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver. As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day. (If I feel like it)

MAY OUR FRIENDSHIP NEVER COME APART ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S STRAIGHT FROM
THE HEART!

MAY YOU ALWAYS HAVE A RAINBOW OF SMILES ON YOUR FACE AND IN YOUR HEART
FOREVER AND EVER!
FRIENDS FOREVER!

Forward this to at least 7 people and see what happens on your screen . You will laugh your head off!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Life is a Metaphor!

Thu, 07 Feb 2008 19:43:13 GMT

My friend Life called me today he said, "I had a seizure, and they don't know what's wrong with me, but they are not going to let me drive for six months" I thought "Life is a Metaphor!" I said, "That's the worst news I have heard in awhile." Life said, "Well at least I am alive!"

And that brings me to the point of all of this; just yesterday I was whining, "Keeping the idea that: Today is going to be the best day of my life, gets more and more difficult as the monotony of each day continues, maybe I am just expecting too much as usual, I have a tendency to be an excitement junky, so the mundane experiences of everyday life never seem to be enough."

It was an epiphany today to hear such bad news. Then Life said, "You have to be grateful for every day" and that just made me feel worse about being so ungrateful, and self centered yesterday. Not appreciating what God has given me, this life and this day, was a real eye opener, for me.

Then when Life said, "You have to keep things in perspective, there has to be some good to come out of all of this" I about fell out of my chair. Just the other day I was saying, "To think that with every devastating news story there has to be some way to possibly see some bright spot in the devastation. I know that sounds morbid of me to say, but without bad there could be no good. It's our perception of reality: Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, is a great way of thinking."

The conversation had me wondering if Life was reading my Blog, and I know that he isn't, because surely, he would have said something about it. I started reading Focus on the Good Stuff: The Power of Appreciation, and I am already feeling guilty about what I had said yesterday. This is actually a true store, and I have replaced my friend's name with Life, and life with my friend.

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Living beyond my Means!

Tue, 05 Feb 2008 21:11:21 GMT

I don't know about you but I am definitely "Living beyond my Means!" The first thing that comes to mind when I hear something like this is: What's in your Wallet? You had better hope that its cash or you could be in the same boat as me, and millions of other American families. The problem is, all of us that are in this boat, really have no choice. We are sucked into it by the lending institutions that are running amuck letting us bury ourselves in a sea of red ink.

Very similar to what the government is doing today, and then pointing their finger at the other guy, who's responsible? Bottom line is we are, because we elected the governmental officials that are spending our money. The point is that something has to be done about this situation, and I am just using Capital One as an example because of the commercials. If you bower $1.00 and the interest rate is 30%, which use to be called loan sharking in the old days, you don't make a payment, which means you now owe $1.30. Do I have that right or am I mistaken? Let me know if I am wrong!

I did a Bible search on borrower and found these verses of scripture:
Proverbs 22:7
The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender.
Isaiah 24:1-3
The LORD's Devastation of the Earth
See, the LORD is going to lay waste the earth and devastate it; he will ruin its face and scatter its inhabitants-it will be the same for priest as for people, for master as for servant, for mistress as for maid, for seller as for buyer, for borrower as for lender, for debtor as for creditor. The earth will be completely laid waste and totally plundered.
The LORD has spoken this word.

The only way that I can see to get out of this mess that I have gotten myself into is to: Stop living beyond my Means, and to get out of debt. I am going to be working on doing just that, I would suggest to the government, and anyone else that is in this same predicament to also do the same.

I am not saying I think everyone should not use credit, but there has to be some kind of fail safes put into place. I look at the Internet fraud of credit cards, and the default on loans, as the reason for a 30% charge of interest. I see justice being served when these criminals that are robbing us blind are prosecuted, and made to return the funds or merchandise or identities they have stolen.

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

An Impossible Choice!

Wed, 30 Jan 2008 15:07:34 GMT

Tammi at the Write Stuff has asked an interesting question, but for me it is "An Impossible Choice!" She said, "If you had to choose one post from your blog to save, which would it be?" My response would be, "I have to choose just one? I don't think that I could choose one post." It's like trying to choose: What day of my life has been the best? and I have been trying to achieve a belief in which: Today is going to be the best day of my life!

Every day I try to write the thoughts, which are on my mind, some days I feel good about the words that I have written in my posts. Other days I am embarrassed by the thoughts, which I have revealed to the world in my post. But never the less, they are the thoughts and what I wanted to write about that day. As I look back at the posts that I have made, I dread thinking that anyone of them might be lost, I guess, I even dread losing the most ridiculous things that I have said.

I think that's one of the greatest things about writing in my Blog, to record my thoughts every day and to try and put my thoughts into words. Not that I think that it's any great achievement or anything like that, but for me it is something that I never would have thought I could do and would even be possible. So to answer your question Tammi: I am going to choose this post because today is the best day of my life!

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

I am going to leave this comment on Tammi's article: I can see why you chose One Word because it is a truly heartfelt entry. Even if the words were gone from the page, I am sure that they will never be gone from your heart. I have used your article today as my writing prompt and wrote: An Impossible Choice! I want to Thank you for asking such a thought provoking question and you have given me something to write about today.

Enjoy Life!

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Inspiring Quotes

Tue, 29 Jan 2008 15:11:17 GMT

Get this free ticker...

I really liked this Inspiring Quotes Ticker it reminds me of the great minds that have shared their wisdom with the world. There is so much to be learned from people with knowledge, and it encourages me to continue to expand my mind. I have a tendency to think, What's the use? and that's no way to think. It just makes me feel bad, and that's not the way that I want to feel. Inspiration is a great motivator; the despair, heart ache, doom & gloom portrayed on the news every day can really make a person feel hopeless.

I understand that the news is just telling us what they think we are interested in, and what will increase their listening audience. To think that with every devastating news story there has to be some way to possibly see some bright spot in the devastation. I know that sounds morbid of me to say, but without bad there could be no good. It's our perception of reality: Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, is a great way of thinking.

I can see that I will need to ponder this kind of thinking further, because I haven't come to a conclusion to understanding the mystical workings of God and the universe. I really wonder if I really thought that I would figure out the meaning of life today!

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

It's Good Enough

Fri, 18 Jan 2008 19:23:17 GMT

I have already posted three entries today:

And for some reason I feel the need to write about "It's Good Enough" it started because of a comment I left about my Fiction Friday entry. Here's the comment:

While writing this I couldn’t help but notice that Faith sounds a lot like Wicked. I am hoping by practicing writing someday I will be able to put more imagination into my stories.
Maybe this is the only voice from within but I am trying to find other interests to write about. There’s always the possibility of finding new and exciting characters, all you have to do is write.
Enjoy Life!

While coping that I corrected an error I had made when I wrote it, and that's really what I want to talk about, anyway. I have this obsession about making everything I do perfect and it's really getting me down. It hinders my ability to try new things, because I am always afraid that I am going to embarrass myself, and I need to get over it.

For example: Today when I did the review on Hacks Space and I mentioned Little Fish Big Pond's site. I wanted to give that site a thumbs up review too, and I thought it would be great to use my Mazda Furai Concept background as the review. I have been trying to understand exactly what backgrounds are, but I just don't get it. I put the HTML for the background in the window for the review but it didn't work. I don't want to redo the review, I want to leave as is as a reminder that I can make a mistake and leave it!

I am reading a new book called: The Key and it's about The Law of Attraction and he's talking about how our subconscious mind can be hindering us in attracting our desires. There's a conflict between our conscious and our subconscious minds, which we need to clear. That's exactly what I am talking about today with "it's good enough." Why make yourself miserable over something that I should have gotten over as a child. That could be part of my problem, with attracting the desires of my heart, into my life.

It's Good Enough is a statement that I am making to myself to allow "ME" to be human: Who do I think I am? Accepting the fact I am going to make mistakes is just part of what I need to learn, along with many other things. As I try to accomplish my goal to have a zest for life!

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

What has your life been Like?

Thu, 10 Jan 2008 20:27:09 GMT

Someone recently asked me this question, "What has your life been Like?" To tell you the truth, I hadn't really thought about it all that much, but maybe I should. I think that it's an excellent question, and one I want to find the answer to. I have a lot of entries in my Blog on Life, and I feel that the answer to that question is right here. But then again, I don't want to disclose a lot of personal information out into the Blogosphere for scammers to take advantage of me either.

I have probably disclosed more information than I should have already, but I guess that's the price you pay to communicate your thoughts out unto the world by writing. I was amazed when this person summarized their life in a few short statements and I thought to myself, There has to be more to their life than that! and I am quite sure that there is. The problem I am having with this question is: What do I think is important in my life? Then to follow it up with: Why can't I just answer the question?

My Life Has Been!

To think of summarizing my life

Could only be done by

Extracting everything life has meant to me

It is an impossible task

For even with immaculate detail

Surely something would be missed

My Unique Life!

I have summarized my life with a poem because I couldn't figure out another way of achieving such a monumental task. I hope that will suffice the question of what my life has been! It certainly feels right to me.

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Experience Project: Life is Short!

Tue, 08 Jan 2008 19:59:19 GMT

I started a new group at the Experience Project: I Want to Know What You Think About "Life Is Short!" group. Yeah, I know the title of the group is kind of long but it's the only way I could think of to start the group was with a statement. The reason I am putting this in my Blog is to record starting the group. I am hoping that other people will find it an interesting subject to write about, like I did today.

This is my Horoscope today: "New clothes would be great, and a new car is fabulous -- so why not a new idea? They hold just as much shiny goodness as anything you can pick up at the mall, but they're totally free! Get rid of your old, outdated ideas today and embrace concepts you never explored before -- scientific phenomena, controversial political stances, unusual religions. Be open to new ideas, and explore concepts that make you really question the status quo. You will only end up wiser."

I don't know if what I am doing is a new idea or not, but I am trying to connect with other people for some reason, I feel that it's important for me to interact with others. I don't even know why I am writing this because I have already posted my entry today here and at the Experience Project. But it hasn't satisfied my need to write and think today as it usually does, it's like I want to keep going on and on, very strange. The part in my Horoscope about "only end up wiser" reminds me of my entry: Wise men or Fools; Something to Say and with that I will say good bye!

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Life is Short!

Tue, 08 Jan 2008 15:57:20 GMT

I really liked this greeting "Life is Short" because in reality none of us know how long we have to live. I want to use it for my writing prompt today. It says: "They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them." I have heard this expression; life is short, from numerous people throughout my life. When you think about it philosophically; comparing it to eternity, life really is short.

It depends on your beliefs though; if you believe in evolution the saying, life is short, might seem true to you. Compared to the billions of years that the earth has evolved, if you lived to be 100 years old, it would seem like a very short period in time in comparison to the billions of years that the earth has existed. I believe that God created the earth and that life is everlasting, our soul is eternal, and although 100 years of life on earth might seem like a long time to live. It would be but a blink of an eye, in comparison, to eternity.

I have written quite a few entries on Life not that I think that I have figured out the age old question of "The Meaning of Life" or anything like that. But the question has existed since the beginning of time and the reason that I am writing about it has to do with my New Year's Resolution and my goal: To have a Zest for Life! Because of the way I hope to achieve that goal is by finding new interests in life and connecting all these thoughts together has sparked some excitement in me.

I am reading a new book: Life's Missing Instruction Manual and in reading it has brought to mind my entry: What if Life came With an Instruction Manual? I am thinking, That's quite a coincidence wouldn't you say? I just started reading the book and I am fascinated with it, it says on the cover: "The Guidebook You Should Have Been Given at Birth" I am also thinking, Well, it's better late than never!

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

A Zest for Life!

Thu, 03 Jan 2008 16:53:41 GMT

This is a goal that I am going to achieve this year and keep forever to have "A Zest for Life!" and the way I am going to do this is by:

Finding new Interests in life
Keeping a positive attitude
Learning something new

Some of you may be thinking, A zest for life? Who doesn't have a zest for life? Everyone wants to live and enjoy life! To those of you who are thinking that I say, "You don't understand what I am talking about because you are able to overcome or "let go of" your negative thoughts." For me it is a problem that I have had my entire life and in the past I have always use anger and rebellion to cope with the feelings of despair. That hasn't worked because it promotes more of the same kinds of feelings of despair and then it spirals making me feel worse.

I have never actually came right out and said that previously in my Blog, but I think that I have said it if you read between the lines. I have also talked about the paranoia that I feel, from my very first entry, which I feel right now writing this. I have talked about the therapeutic value that I receive by writing my thoughts and how I feel like; something is holding me back, in regards to what I write, the mental editor. That editor is probably a good thing because I don't want to expose anyone else to my negativity, anymore than, I unintentionally already have.

So there you have it; at this very moment I am thinking, You can't post this! What are people going it think? and that's what I need to overcome, what I think you might think, so that I can continue writing, learning and striving to achieve my goal: To have a Zest for Life!

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Goal: A Zest For Life

Thu, 18 Oct 2007 13:53:17 GMT

I thought it would be a good idea to let everyone know where this goal came from "A Zest For Life" because it needs some explanation. I have been troubled with Negative Thoughts throughout my entire Life and so I made this goal for myself on 11/29/2006 in the hopes of achieving it. I would usually just insert a link to my Blog entry to show you, but because I am writing this for the Experience Project story for my goal I will need to copy it to show you.

This is my Blog entry from November 29, 2006:

Working on Goals in Life

I am having a hard time discovering what My Goals in Life are? I think about what do you want to be when you grow up but I grew up a long time ago and I still don't have a clue. I don't seem to have any motivation to do any thing, what is my problem?

The best thing I could come up with for a Goal, I would like to achieve is: My goal in Life is to have a Zest: hearty enjoyment: lively enjoyment and enthusiasm for Life, exciting and enjoyable quality: an exciting or interesting aspect of something that makes it particularly enjoyable in Life, I guess that would be my Goal.

The next question is how do I achieve this Goal? This goal is not tangible: able to be touched: or perceived through the sense of touch, actual: capable of being understood and evaluated, and therefore regarded as real, able to be realized: capable of being given a physical existence Goal so what am I going to do? I still think it's a Great Goal but how will I know when I have achieved it? Maybe I will need to ponder this question further.

Some of the writing in that entry is taken from the dictionary and changed somewhat to express my goal.

Events that have taken place in my Life since that entry that I feel have completely change my Life are: Listen to Joel Osteen's positive messages every Sunday, learn about The Secret/The Law of Attraction and letting God take care of the problems that are beyond my ability to solve.

This is what is written in the goal logo:

He will give His Angels charge over you to guard you in all your ways

Psalm 91:11

I have also read many of the books written by Esther & Jerry Hicks that have had a very positive affect on my thinking. As far as achieving this goal; I think that there's always a way to feel better and I will continue to pursue A Zest For Life, until the end.

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Goal: Thoughts Into Writing

Wed, 17 Oct 2007 14:37:19 GMT

What could be a better place to start this goal than with a story about putting my "Thoughts Into Writing" and I just realized that setting a goal is the same as starting a group, from what I can tell. I have been a member here since October 4, 2007 and although I haven't figured everything out yet, I have really enjoyed learning about the Experience Project.

I have met so many new friends here already and I have been very excited about reading all your stories. I have joined or started 15 groups so far and I have 1 other goal that I need to write a story for because I read somewhere that you shouldn't start a group/goal without writing a story. I haven't found a place where you can go and read the rules for the site. That was one of the reasons that I joined: I Am New Here, and I'm Confused but there hasn't been much activity in that group.

This is from my biography in Technorati:

I started my Blog on November 25, 2006 and I wanted a Web page where I could "Learn Something New!" Windows Live Spaces made it so easy that even I could do it. I made a commitment to myself to write something in my Blog everyday.

The reason that I am writing something everyday is to Learn Something New! It may be about writing, about myself or about the World that we all live in: I haven't figured all that out yet. Maybe I never will but it sure is fun trying.

Enjoy Life!

I hope that you haven't lost interest in my story but like the goal says, "I Want to Communicate My Thoughts Into Writing Proficiently" is what the original goal was. That must have been to many letters for the space provided, I am guessing, but that is what is on the goal logo.

This story/goal/entry is from the Experience Project and I am using it as my Blog entry for today.

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

What is Normal?

Thu, 30 Aug 2007 23:07:19 GMT

There was a time that I thought that I was normal, but then I asked myself the question: "What is Normal?" What defines a so-called normal person? I have always felt that I was different from everyone else, and felt that I was not normal. But, isn't each human being different from every other human being? Do these differences make someone not normal vs. normal?

There are so many days that I have trouble trying to think of something to write in my Blog. Sometimes this makes me feel that I am not normal. But, I ask again: "What is normal?" I have heard that many great authors had their share of problems in trying to communicate their thoughts into writing. So, I guess if you look at it that way, I am normal.

I try to express myself honestly when writing in my Blog. I guess the problem lies in the fact that I don't consider myself a writer and I feel self-conscience about some of the things that I write. I sometimes feel that what I write in my Blog makes no sense to anyone but myself.

Getting back to the normal vs. not normal issue; I do not think it is possible to define a "normal" person. I think the problem may be that most of the time I feel different from everyone else, but is that necessarily a bad thing? I don't think so. Each of us is different from every other human being on earth. So, if I am different, doesn't that make me normal???

I can't change the way that I am, it's the way that God has created me to be and I can view it as why me? Or I can accept it and carry out whatever God's will is for me to be and that's what I am going to do. I feel that what I have written in my Blog today explains why I have titled my website "My Unique Life". Me asking, "What is Normal?"

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

I Needed this Today!

Wed, 22 Aug 2007 21:11:27 GMT

What a great article by Steve Pavlina: Life Sucks, Then You Die and I really liked what he had to say: "I Needed this Today!" It sounds like a pep talk from someone who has been where I am at, most of the time, in my life. It reminds me of The Law of Attraction but he doesn't come right out and say that in his article. If I could express my thoughts into writing the way Steve has in this article I would be so proud of myself. I hope that Steve is patting himself on the back after writing this article because he deserves it.

I am going to have to check out the Forum on his article to see what other people have to say about it. Reading the article and reading about how other people have changed their lives hasn't helped me to overcome my problems in life. It's great to hear that it can be done and it makes me wonder how many times he had to "Never Give Up" in order to achieve his success. He did say that it took him a few years to get into the situation he wanted.

The point to all of this is until I get it into my head that life is what you make it and I have control over my life, so be the creator of the life you want. It sure is a lot easier to write it than it is to do it. No one said that life is easy but with a positive attitude and faith in God maybe even I can find what I am looking for in life. Me saying, "I Needed this Today!"

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Staring at the Page

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 22:11:25 GMT

I have been "Staring at the Page" for about an hour now wondering what to write about today. One of the ideas that I had thought about writing today was; what major accomplishment have you made in your life? I really didn't feel like writing about that because it's just too painful or is it because I feel like it's too revealing. The difference between success and failure are how you look at what you have tried to achieve.

When I was younger, I never thought I would have lived this long because I did some crazy things in my youth. Looking back at the way that I was makes me feel that God has some purpose for my being here on this earth or He would have just let me do myself in with one of those crazy stunts. I would say that I have changed a lot since those crazy days but I still can't figure out what it is that I am suppose to be doing with my life now.

I have always felt restless in my life, like there is something that I am supposed to accomplish in life but I think that is how a lot of people feel, is that right? Now that I am getting older I have been trying to Meditate to relieve that feeling of restlessness. I have read books, articles and been told by be people to practice "Just Being" and I have tried for about three years now to practice Meditation. Although I feel like it does help me, I really don't think that I fully understand all the benefits of Meditation.

I read this article The Wind Up yesterday and I think that D. Challener Roe really has something there with the whole wind up theory to writing. I was staring at this blank page far to long before I even tried to write anything. I am not much of a baseball fan but if you never "Wind Up" how are you going to write anything. I will be looking forward to more in this series on Living with the Writer. Me writing about "Staring at the Page."

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

I must have said it All

Mon, 13 Aug 2007 23:21:21 GMT

That's how I feel today; like "I must have said it All" because I can't seem to think of anything that I want to write about in my Blog today. Maybe it's because I haven't had very many visitors coming to my Blog lately, so it's like what's the use, if no one else is going to read it. That's missing the whole point of why I am doing this though and that's to write something in my Blog everyday and "Learn Something New" about trying to communicate my thoughts into writing.

It's just so easy to not do something; you give up and that's the end of it but I am not going to let me do that to myself. The other day when I wrote Are You having fun Today? I did a Google search to see what I could find about that topic and I found this great article: Are You Having Any Fun? It even has this PDF file of the responses of all the readers of his article, really good stuff, about what other people do for fun in their lives. When I read articles like this I wonder why I even try to write in my Blog, but that's another story.

I need to get my head in the game of Life and find out what I think fun is to me today, I use to think that I knew what fun was to me, but today I can't seem to have any fun for some reason. Just being alive should be fun, but I seem to be able to make myself miserable living, isn't that ridiculous? I have a lot of work to do figuring out what I think fun is to me, I hope that you already know what fun is to you. If not check out that PDF Having Fun file, I know that's what I am going to do. Me writing "I must have said it All."

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

Are You having fun Today?

Sat, 11 Aug 2007 21:00:14 GMT

I always like to ask that question, "Are You having fun Today?" Because I feel like having fun is a state of mind, like happiness; it is how you feel about your life and if you are accomplishing your goals in life. I am a little sad today because no one visited my website last night but I don't know why anyone would visit my site it is not like it is filled with important information or anything like that. It is just a place where I try to write down what's on my mind today.

I think it's funny what I do allow myself to write some times because in my mind I am always editing out thoughts that I don't think are worthy of writing in my Blog for fear that someone might stop by and read them, kind of Corny don't you think? I am always looking for things to become interested in; I just can't seem to find things that will hold my interest for very long and then it's time to search for something new.

I did see a good video on someone else's site that I really liked: Steve Jobs Stanford Commencement Speech 2005 and I hope that you will like it too. I must be still trying to connect the dots in my life because I am always searching for new interests. I have always found it difficult to follow my heart; people say follow your heart like it is something that is written on a map somewhere. There is a lot of wisdom in that speech if only I could connect the dots. Me saying, "Are You having fun Today?"

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

You have to Type

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 20:27:22 GMT

That's what I am saying to myself right now "You have to Type" to write something, easier said than done for me today. I don't know what it's about finding something to write about for me lately but I wish that the words would start appearing. I think my problem is that I can't seem to find things that interest me lately, I have written about it before; Finding New Interests but I guess it's another one of those things that I keep shying away from rather than dealing with it.

Most of the time I feel like I am on the verge of finding something new and exciting in my life but it never seems to come to light for me. I have been told by people to try meditating to help discover whatever it is that I am seeking. The idea is to "Just Be" and quit trying to force whatever it is I am looking for into my Life and let it take its natural course. I have never been very patient with the wait and see what happens theory of Life and I am always trying to make things happen, without success.

I really have no idea what this thing is that I am expecting out of Life, maybe it's all the exciting things that I thought would happen to me when I was a child. You know the Delusions of Grandeur that all children have that someday they will have all their dreams come true but one would think that as an adult I would have faced reality by now. Well I guess that's enough writing therapy for me today, I feel better, and I hope you enjoyed it as well. Me saying, "You have to Type."

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

Link to My Unique Life in Windows Live Space

The Meaning of Life Video

Tue, 29 May 2007 22:11:17 GMT

What would you do if you had an envelope with "The Meaning of Life" written inside of the envelope? Would you want to know? Would you read it? The reason I am asking this question is I watched this video and be fore warned there is profanity used in it when he finds out what the meaning of life is but its Bleeped out. Here's a link to the video; I HAVE THE MEANING OF LIFE! - Do you want it?

So what do you think? One of my favorite Quotes about "The Meaning of Life" is in my Profile but I don't know who the author is to this quote;

The Meaning of Life
Lies in Courageously
Facing the Fact
That it May have No Meaning

Maybe that quote was inside the envelope and that's what got him so upset? I liked the video because I often ponder the meaning of life but I don't know if I had the answer right in front of me what I would think. Me pondering, "The Meaning of Life Video."

Thanks for Listening,

Jeff

Link to My Unique Life in Windows Live Space